Not Sweet
by Songfic Misstress
Summary: What happens if Light takes away Ryuzaki's sweets? lots of bad things, that's what! no real pairings, though Misa and Light are a couple. Humor. My First Death Note Fic. please give feed back. Flames are NOT SWEET, and will be used to make candy.


Disclaimer: I do not own anything. if i did own death note, or a death note, I would rule the world.

Ryuzaki loved sweets. He stirred five (or more) sugar cubes into his coffee using a lolipop as a stir stick. A chocolate bar could not remain in his presence for more than a few minutes without being consumed. He lived for cakes, pies, an other delectably rich dessersts. He LOVED his sweets with a passion. Light Yagami. loathed Ryuzaki, not only for the threat that he posed to the future utopia headed by Kira, but for the cavity inducing selective appetite. Light decided to try and...mildly inconvenience Ryuzaki.

Lights' father noticed Light taking out an abnormal amount of garbage. He simply smiled, thinking proudly about how his son was so hard working and a prodigy. Little did he know that Light has emptied Ryuzaki's private mini fridge and all the sweets and junk food form the task force head quarters into these bags, which would be gone to the dump the following morning. A grin played along Light's lips as he tossed the garbage bags into a pile. Now to go grocery shopping.

Light almost bought himself some BBQ chips when he was at the store, but then reexamined his goal. Better not to have any junk food around.He returned many things from his cart to the shelves in the store. Misa would be pissed that he didn't get her any bubble gum, but so be it. He stocked up on some stuff that was relatively cheap, easy, edible, and NOT SWEET.

When Ryuzaki got up in the morning, he couldn't find any sugar for his coffee. This frustrated him. He had sent Watari to go get a bulk box just a week before. he KNEW 100 that there was still some left. Someone had moved it. Or more likely, gotten rid of it. Who would do such a thing? He thought for a few seconds...Light Yagami...he had gotten some liquid sweetener stuff though, so no worries. Ryuzaki opened the fridge and fell to his knees. "No" he whispered. The fridge was empty but for a few water bottles and a small beaker of milk, there as also a small plate that appeared to have something green and possibly alive on it.

"How am i supposed to drink my coffee without anything sweet in it?!" He asked no one in particular, as he was alone in his room. Ryuzaki tried a sip of milked down coffee and spluttered. Light would pay for this dearly, it was like a murder attempt! Well...maybe not as serious as all that...there was sure to be something edible in the main task force kitchen. Yes, he would eat, then devise a counter attack to Light's petty prank.

He found and opened the main fridge. He peered inside and was disgusted. Huge quantities of different varieties of the same milk bi-product. Gouda, Cheddar, Tex-Mex shredded, Stinking bishop...all freaking cheese...NOT SWEET.

He closed the fridge; choosing to root through the cup boards..he was very hungry now. he found various, non ramen types of soup, primarily cream of mushroom. Ryuzaki wrinkled his nose. NOT SWEET.

Now ravenous, Ryuzaki broke. He lurched back to the fridge, clutching his stomach. He ripped open a bag of Tex Mex with his teeth and poured the shredded stuff into a bowl clumsily, using only his index fingers. He shoved the opened bag back into the fridge, taking his bowl to the coffee table. He settled into his big comfy chair, and began to eat the cheesy substance with his fingers, picking up single strands and popping them into his mouth using his forefinger and thumb. NOT SWEET.

Ryuzaki loathed the taste at first, but he soon began to accept it. It was just when it was starting to go from "barley tolerable" to "not that bad" that Matsuda walked in. Matsuda looked more idiotic than usual as he stared at Ryuzaki in shock, jaw agape, yes wide. Ryuzaki didn't like it that he was being stared at by someone who had already filled their quota of staring at him. Matsuda was an idiot, but did he have to show it so often? After a hew moments Ryuzaki cleared his cheesy throat. "Is there a problem Matsuda-san?

Matsuda looked at Ryuzaki incredulously. "You mean you haven't noticed?" he asked.

Ryuzaki rolled his eyes. "I can live with something other than sweets you know. This is almost ...good. I'll have you kn-"

Matsuda cut Ryuzaki off. "Not that, i couldn't care less what you're eating. it's how you're sitting!"

Ryuzaki felt befuddled. Wait a sec, what the hell?...Since when did Ryuzaki not feel smart? He looked down t his legs...and realized that he had to look down. His knees were not at his chin, as he always had them.

He jumped up, scattering grated cheese all over the coffee table. "NO!" he yelled at his legs, scaring the living daylights out of Matsuda.

"Ryuzaki...you're legs don't have ears...even I know that." he turned his head and muttered. "Not sweet."

Ryuzaki ran away, planing as well as he could to get revenge on Light. That little stunt had cost him 70 of his intellect...he was now only just above average. The horror!!

Please R&R


End file.
